Pardon the digression. Where was I? Oh, yes, now I remember, I was in Heather's knickers! Well, her Chaste Couture underwear did not work as well as intended by the manufacturer, and I praise the Lord for it. But let us return to Lucifer's "Life of the Apostle Paul" (part 2):
In October, 39 CE, when they first heard back home that Saul the Persecutor had resurfaced in Damascus under the name Paul the Apostle, and that he was preaching the gospel and selling holy Paul aprons, almost everyone back home was totally gobsmacked, including his own mother. But the Jewish bankers to whom Saul owed money sent an expedition post haste to Damascus, with just one objective: "Get Saul."
If no Voice met them on the way, Saul was toast. No Voice did. The "Get Saul" crowd sought and obtained a warrant for his arrest, authorised by the Roman tetrarch (2 Cor. 11:32).
Saint Paul at the time was lodging in Damascus with three Christian bachelors who had a flat located along the city wall. The first sign of trouble came late at night, with a fierce pounding at the door. An authoritative voice shouted: "Open up! It's the Damascene guard!"
The second sign of trouble was the shrill voice of Benjamin Bar-Tubal of Tarsus, shouting, hysterically, "We know you're in there, Saul, and you owe me 600 denarii! Open the door, you Christian shvantz, you thieving shmutzik-that-fell-from-a-pig!" (or words to that effect).
The three Christian brothers flew into action. One kept Mr. Bar-Tubal and the Damascene Guard busy at the door while the other two put the frightened apostle into a buckbasket and lowered him by ropes from a window to the ground below, outside the city wall (2 Cor. 11:33).
By the time the Guard broke down the door and arrested Paul's three friends and took them away to be fed to the lions, the apostle was long gone (Acts 9:23-2 5).
– L.
