Now here's something you may not realise, especially if you're a Roman Catholic: In the first century of the Christian Era, Simon Peter conducted evangelistic crusades that were almost exactly like the Rev. Billy and Frankie Graham's, only smaller – same Saviour, same gospel message, same music more or less, same basic strategy of preaching to the choir. Saint Peter's evangelistic organisation filled the stands to capacity with born-agains from the local area churches who looked normal but who were actually trained spiritual counselors. Unsaved relatives and neighbours were offered free admission, a few of whom would actually show up, out of curiosity, or out of nagging from saved family members.
On a good day, Peter's crusades were standing room only, just like Billy's. One difference: Simon Peter's Greater World Evangelistic Crusades were held usually in a revival tent, not in a Roman stadium. But then, Simon Peter never really cared for such venues as a Roman Circus stadium. In those days, a stadium for gladiatorial games was the last place a good Christian like Peter would be seen.
(Editor: please mend my ambiguous syntax.)
Simon Peter was not a polished orator; but for a fellow with small Latin and less Greek, he did okay. He coaxed, he persuaded, he pleaded, he thundered. When that country boy from Galilee furled his brows so intently, and smiled so maternally, and beckoned to the crowd in that gentle drawl, what reprobate sinner could have refused? (Well, I mean I could – but who else? Not many. Mostly "uncircumcised dogs," and people of that sort.)
Not everyone fully understood Peter's message of salvation. That is because he spoke in Aramaic. Gentiles begged Simon Peter to study Latin, the language of the Roman Empire, so as to reach a wider audience, and I'll say this for him, he tried. When he was on the road for his Greater World Crusades (outside Palestine), Peter "preached in tongues," which is to say, in a mishmash of Aramaic, Latin, Aramaic, Hebrew, Syriac, pidgin Greek, and Aramaic. No one in the audience, except the charismatics, understood a thing he said.
Peter practiced hard and eventually became a successful evangelist. (Frankie: Take note; don't give up!) By the time Peter and Paul had their great quarrel at Antioch in 50 CE, many spectators thought it was a tossup, which of the two great rivals was the more powerful speaker. Nevertheless, Peter often felt discouraged, for he had less success in the numbers department than Paul did. The churches founded by Paul grew exponentially; and Peter's, by only one or two members at a time – usually by wooing some young couple from one of Paul's churches just down the street.
Here's how the plan of salvation worked at one of Saint Peter's evangelical crusades: If you were a Jew getting saved for the first time, that was cool. You prayed, you got forgiven, you received the holy Ghost, they gave you the literature (the Four Steps, and an unfinished draft of the New Testament), and you went home happy. For shiksas, it was the same basic plan. But gentile boys and men who came forward at the altar call were obliged to follow what the Twelve disciples, including Simon Peter, called "The Eight Steps to Peace with God" (Acts 15:1). I translate from the original Latin:
Steps 1-4: [same as for a Billy Graham Crusade].
Step 5: One of our trained spiritual counselors shall lead you out the back exit, where little tents have already been set up to receive you, and a born-again surgeon in each one.
Step 6: You must wait in line until it's your turn.
Step 7: Our trained spiritual counselors will tie you four-square to tent stakes and hoist your toga. The born-again surgeon will then cut the foreskin from off your privy male member. (It is not as painful as it sounds.)
Step 8: Your counselor will then wrap you in gauze, and shake your hand, and say, "Welcome to the Kingdom of Heaven: you've been saved."
Until the apostle Paul came along with his new, revolutionary, and streamlined eschatology for gentile men, no male sinner was fully saved until fully circumcised (Matt. 5:18, Acts 10:44-45); which led to a certain gender imbalance, under Saint Peter's ministry, in the total number of men and women who accepted Christ as their personal lord and saviour.
For a modern-day evangelist like Jim Bakker or Marvin Gorman or Jesse Jackson or Jimmy Swaggart, a surplus of women in the church would not be a matter of overmuch concern; but it was a big problem for Simon Peter, who was already united in holy matrimony, and getting up in years, and not really on the prowl.
Now even though Simon Peter was quite emphatic about the gospel's Jewish roots, many gentile men nevertheless came to hear him preach; and many came forward at the altar call, to receive the spiritual counseling and the promotional literature. Well and good. The saved gents were then led out through the back exit, for steps 5 through 8 – and that is when (under Saint Peter's ministry) new converts started to backslide in their Christian faith.
As they made their way prayerfully toward the surgeon's tent, about half of the guys just bolted. Others split while waiting in line, when they realised what was going down. And if any of the converts in the medical tent happened to scream while under the surgeon's knife, as often happened, an entire crusade's harvest of male converts could be lost in a flash, as they scattered like dust in the wind (Acts 9:31).
– L.
